Not Perfect Yet

Thinking this morning about my job teaching preschool children with various disabilities and challenges. I love it, yet it seems lately all I see are my mistakes and failures. I so badly want others to see how big our God is – how He heals, and also how He enables people to handle everything  that gets thrown their way.

I suppose in my mind I’ve had a picture of a polished super-woman who never gets flustered or upset. Someone who always has it all together, who handles every challenging situation or behavior with exactly the right response every single time, and who has every piece of paperwork in order and on time.

That ain’t me. No matter how hard I try.

As I thought about it, God surprised me. “Think about David,” He said.

“David was a shepherd. I elevated him to be king. Do you think he knew how to do that? He wasn’t perfect. He made mistakes. But I chose him because he chose Me, which made him a safer choice than his brothers.

“So, no, David didn’t know how to be king. But he knew how to trust Me, how to turn to Me, and how to pour out his heart to Me without fearing I would turn away from him. How could I? I put him in that place. I knew it would be hard. I expected him to need to turn to Me. I wanted him to.

“You keep thinking you will finally ‘get it’ and not need Me so much. That’s not why I put you there. Pretty soon you will need Me even more. Learn it now!

“Yep, you’re not perfect at it. What if it never comes together like you think it should – nice and neat and looks so pretty and perfect? Do you think that is what will give Me glory and make others want Me?

“What if it’s Me shining through those weaknesses that gives Me glory? The love you show despite, the concern you show despite, the work you put in despite…? What if I’m already getting the glory and you just didn’t realize it because you had a different picture in mind?”

Oh . . .

“Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things – and the things that are not – to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before Him” (I Corinthians 1:26-29).

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